Ryan Arbon, found wondering the wilderness of Stevenage in the mid 90's, installed in a maroon shirt and placed on a rugby pitch. Believed to have escaped a government science facility, and is in fact the result of splicing tarantula and salmon DNA into that of a laboratory monkey. This also explains his stunted vocabulary, and tentative grasp of English grammar. A few seasons ago he went missing but we just don't talk about that. He also breaks his mates legs, which is why we think Simon Banner is now on the other side of the planet to ensure he isn't victim of Ryan's "friendship".
Favorite Song: Can't touch this!
Favorite Film: Rudy
Favorite Drink: Whatever is in the Banner Manor
Favorite Food: Lamb Boona
Favorite Book: Spot went to the circus
Likes: What everybody else dislikes
Dislikes: What everybody else likes